April 2012 – Page 3 – Betsy Schow

Dress for Success: Bra Fit

Sorry boys, this post is ladies only.

An ill fitting bra can ruin any size woman’s figure. We’ve all seen the signs. Saggy boobs. Or worse… back boobs. Then there are the falling straps, or the ones that cut off circulation. Heaven forbid, you can even fall out.

Every woman should have regular bra fittings. I like the Nordstrom ladies personally. I know its scary and a embarrassing. If you absolutely can’t bring yourself to do it, then use these tips to find the right size. And remember to Try on, try on , try on. Just because you have the right size, doesn’t mean every brand bra will be cut or fit right for your shape.

Step 1. Make sure the bra band is comfortable but snug. You should be able to fit 2 fingers underneath by stretching a little. A regular bra should not be trying to make you smaller. That would be a corset. An entirely different undergarment.

Step 2. Make sure the band is parallel and horizontal all the way around. The back should be part should be as low as the front. No riding up. Cuz if the back goes up, the front goes down.This makes for saggy boobs.

Step 3. Underwires are your friend. And friends don’t pinch or poke. Make sure the under wire contours your body snug to the ribcage without sticking out.

Step 4. Use the Goldilocks test on the cups. Not too small, not too big, just right. There shouldn’t be extra space in the cup. On the other hand there shouldn’t be spillage either. If it doesn’t fit in the cup, move up a cup. Play with different styles until you find the cup shape that fits your breast. Some cups are very narrow, and this causes side spillage if you have a wider breast area.

Step 5. Give it the jiggle test. Raise your arms ups and down. Are the girls safe locked and loaded? Or do they pop up or the cup wrinkles?

If at first you don’t succeed, keep trying different brands. A good bra is the foundation for your frame. Crappy bra, crappy contours. Good luck and happy hunting.

P is for Potty Party

It’s time to be proactive. I’m go to do the same thing I did for my first kiddo. She was ready, but we just couldn’t make a clean break from the pull ups. So we did a potty party. Potty training in one day.

I’ve about had it with my 2 and a half year old. She uses the potty about half the time. The other half, she changes her own diaper – and then hides the evidence.

In the case of the dreaded poopy diapers, all I can say is eewwww. For whatever reason potty training my second child has been much more difficult than training my first. But I’m busier now. Perhaps if I just spent more time. Well you know what they say about ifs and buts. But my problem is specifically about the butt.

The idea is to make it fun, almost like a birthday party. We invited a few friends over, there was a special cake, little presents, and lots of fun potty games. The whole day was spent playing with the potty and saying goodbye to the diaper. She was a big girl that could wear underwears.

This made a connection in my first daughter’s brain. Of course we had a few accidents afterwards, but just like a birthday party to celebrate getting older, she had celebrated growing up and getting rid of the diapers.

So I think in the next month I am really going to push the little one to lose the diapers. Let the party planning begin.

What worked for you and little poopers?

Snack Smart: Arctic Zero Ice Cream

Sometimes life demands ice cream. There is just no way around it. If you’re anything like me, sometimes life demands the entire pint. Ben and Jerrys used to be my choice for death by calories. Now, I find it difficult to justify at least 1000 calories, no matter how great pumpkin cheesecake tastes.

This is a solution that works for me when my day has sucked bad enough that they only remedy is a spoon and a pint. It’s called Arctic Zone ice cream. I had the Mint Chocolate Chip. I warn you, it’s spendy around 4 bucks a pint. And it’s no Ben and Jerrys. But it is 150 calories. For the whole pint.

It’s gluten free, lactose free, organic and natural, and low sugar. So it probably tastes like crap right? It’s actually not bad. Don’t expect it to be creamy fattening ice cream, because you will be disappointed. But if you need the cold, frozen, dig your spoon into something, fix- then give it a try. Think of it more like a minty chocalatey slushy.

O is for Octopus

This is what I wish I was. For obvious reasons, the 8 hands.

It would be so nice to get laundry folded, while typing my WIP, playing with my kids, and burning dinner.

Just a side note on my favoritism of the octopus. When I was a kid, my mom would send me to school with a brown bag lunch. But they weren’t ordinary brown bags, my mother would decorate them with fanciful creatures. My favorite was a bag she made in 3rd grade. It had an octopus drawn on it, arms stretched wide. It said, “I love you THIS much”. Kids would try to trade their cookies for my bags, but I would never part with them. My mom was an artist, and each bag was proof that she loved me THIS much.

Fitness Tips: Abs Part 2

Here’s the second ab video with Jessica to Mambo #5. Remember to alternate this and video number 1 every other day. And that’s how you strengthen your core and get a great ab workout for under 5 minutes a day

N is for No

This would currently be my 2 1/2 year old daughter’s favorite word. And if that wasn’t enough, my husband, tired of the no, taught her other fabulous ways to say it. Nien, Niecht, nu-uh, no way jose, nope. All Ns.

Now while the little one has this down pat, I seem to have trouble saying it. When someone asks me to do something I immediately say sure. It isn’t until I get home and have a panic attack when I input it into my schedule, that I realize I may be a tish overstretched.

Why is it that sometimes we are incapable of saying no? Is it because we want to help and genuinely feel the desire to serve? Or (at least for me) the more likely culprit of not wanting to disappoint someone.

Oddly enough, when someone else offers to do something for me, I don’t hesitate to say no thanks. I suppose I don’t want to be someone’s burden.

Just rambling out loud on the keyboard.

The Long Run: Pride cometh before the fall

This week I had myself a little spark of correction. I had to rearrange my running schedule because my best friend and head of the fat pack, Sarah Michelle, is getting married today. I moved my run to Wednesday. It was a 17 miler. I figured that if I dropped my kiddos off at preschool at 9, I had 3 hours to get the run done. Shouldn’t be a problem.

It was a problem. My legs did not want to cooperate. I kept checking my watch for my pace, sure that it was wrong, but no. I was going slow.

The smart thing to do would have been to go at the pace that I needed to go at to finish the miles without taxing my legs. Did I do that? Of course not. I pushed myself faster and harder to try and make sure I could get the kids picked up on time.

I’ll tell you what happened. I was still late, and now my previously injured hamstring is acting up. Why didn’t I just call my mom to pick up the kids? Because of pride, that’s why. Because I thought I should be able to match my personal best on any given day. I felt like I needed to prove to myself that I was not getting slower.

Stupid Betsy. It’s ok to be slow. It’s ok to be fast. It’s ok to be whatever I am today.
It just took a little spark of correction in my hamstring to remember that.

M is for Mistakes in Motherhood

Not a day goes by without a moment where I think, yup I have scarred my kids for life.

Words sound a whole lot different coming out of my mouth than my five year old’s. Sometimes I can’t tell how harsh something sounds until it’s parroted back at me.

The other night my oldest daughter was playing with her little sister. Apparently a two and half year old does not grasp the finer nuances of whack-a-mole and my preshcooler took issue with that.
“If you can’t play right, you don’t get to play,” she shouted and threw the game across the room.
I took issue with her behavior. My reply was angry and scolding, “If you can’t play nicely, you won’t have any friends and no one will want to play with you.” Then, since it was close to bedtime, I sent her off to her room to chill out and go to sleep early.

Alas she did not go quietly in the night. For the next half hour I could hear her screaming from her bed. “I don’t want to go to sleep. I hate you. I’m going to go find a new family.” A little while later I heard the phrase that broke my heart. “I don’t want to be alone. I need friends.”

Somewhere along the line I had screwed up. I had made a colossal mistake in motherhood and made my daughter feel unloved. It had not been my intent to hurt, just a frustrated attempt at correction. So What was I gonna do about it now?

I felt it would be an even worse mistake to let my child go off to sleep thinking that no one loved her. So I sat down with her, gave her loves and took the 2 minutes to explain why her behavior was unacceptable. Basically what I should have done in the first place. Afterwards I got my kiss goodnight and she was out like a light.

Not so much for me. I sobbed to my husband that I was the worst mother in the whole world. That we should start saving now because my kids would end up having huge therapy bills. He reminded me that kids were pretty darn resilient and my daughter would get over it. And the next time I got angry, I should just love ’em to death.

Sure enough, the next day my daughter gave me oodles of love and hugs. Telling me she loved me, that I was the best mommy ever. What I learned was that everybody makes mistakes. In particular, I will continue to make mistakes. It’s what we do afterwards that defines us as a parent.

I for one am going to apologize to my mother for the time I packed up my stuffed animals and ran away to my best friends house. I don’t remember what she did that made me so angry, but I remember the tears in her eyes when she couldn’t find me. Sure when I was discovered I got grounded, but I also got nearly hugged to death.

Exercise for the Soul: Box Breathing

Here’s an important part of exercise often overlooked…breathing. It’s automatic, so we tend not to think about it, but breathing can be the key to weight loss and fitness success. Proper breathing reduces stress levels, and helps facilitate fat loss. It also provides oxygen to the muscles, allowing them to work harder and get stronger. Some experts claim you can even lose a size just by breathing. I don’t know about that, but I know my mental and physical well being have improved dramatically, just by taking the time to breathe properly.

Here’s an exercise called boxed breathing:

Step 1: Sit up straight, making sure your lungs are not constricted by poor posture.

Step 2: Close your eyes and clear your mind

Step 3 Close your mouth (unless you have hayfever) and breahte in deeply through the nose for 4 counts.

Step 4 Hold breathe inside for 4 counts, allowing it to fill your body.

Step 5 Exhale for 4 counts.

Step 6 Complete the box by holding breath again for 4 counts.

Repeat at least 5 times for a calmer more focused you 🙂

L is for Lullaby

My favorite part of the day when my girls were little, was bedtime. Not only because the little beasts were going to sleep, but because of our lullaby ritual.

I would swaddle my baby and sit in the rocking chair and sing a song or two until there little eyes were nice and droopy. Sometimes I would sing Twinkle Twinkle, or Rock a Bye Baby. But I had a favorite lullaby for each girl that is a little… different. I figured, hey they don’t know what the heck I’m saying. As long as it’s low and soothing I could sing the phonebook.

So for my oldest, my favorite tune was Death Cab for Cutie’s I”ll follow you into the dark.

For my little one is was the Smith’s Sing me to sleep.

To this day I get misty eyed when I hear those songs on the radio. They remind me of a time that was precious, crazy, and worth every minute.

What did you sing to your little ones?